Looking for a casual hookup in the City by the Bay? Want to try your luck without using Tinder?
Melbourne has recently overtaken Sydney at the most populous city in Australia. With a growing population of 5.3 million, there’s a high proportion of city singles looking to enjoy the thriving nightlife and active bar scene. There’s plenty of no strings fun to be had, if you play your cards right. 😉
In this guide, we take you on a whirlwind tour of the best opportunities for casual encounters in Melbs. From the top pick-up bars in town, to the wild swinging scene, to some very useful casual dating tools. Bookmark and enjoy!
Melbourne Hookups: So, What Are Your Chances?
Melbourne is famous for its many adult attractions. It’s often said that sex is everywhere you look in the coastal capital. Punters can have a field day if they’re willing to vote with their wallets.
But if you’re not willing to use the legal brothels, AMPs or sex shops… what are the chances of hooking up the old-fashioned way?
Well, there are certainly easier cities for striking it lucky. The Melbourne crowd is known for being metropolitan, friendly and approachable. But the women here are picky, with high standards, and a pretty low tolerance for the bullshit of a try-hard pickup artist.
This comment from one disgruntled Reddit gentleman sums it up nicely:
Ok from a guys perspective I find Melb pretty horrible. Everyone has a chip on their shoulder and if you’re not perfect in any little way for some reason that’s a deal breaker even before or after a first date. Compared to other states I found Melbourne girls seem incredibly fussy. It doesn’t help that generally you have to be in the in crowd and people can be judgemental if you’re seen out with someone else they wouldn’t expect you to be with.
We’ve seen reports of foreigners visiting Melbourne (particularly Americans) and being taken back by how approaching women simply isn’t the ‘done’ thing around here. Offering to buy a girl a drink if you don’t know her is likely to invite raised eyebrows. You okay, mate?
Friendship groups can be extremely cliquey, and hard for outsiders to penetrate. The women complain that guys are emotionally cold (“he’s got two tricks: throwing jokes or punches“). The guys complain that unless you’re in the top 5% of looks, or a born extroverted comedian, you’ll have a bloody hard time getting your leg over.
Where is the truth? Probably somewhere in the middle.
This guide looks at various ways you can bypass the serial awkwardness of dating in the wild, but it makes sense that we start with the nightlife scene.
Popular Melbourne Pick Up Bars
Melbourne has 16.1 bars per 100,000 people meaning there are over 800 pubs alone with numerous other night spots to try your luck.
We’ve put together a list of our favourite drinking holes where the odds of a hook-up are stacked slightly in your favour.
The Toff
252 Swanston St, Melbourne VIC 3000
Decorated in the art deco styling of train carriages, this unique and quirky bar has live music and theatre. It’s also one of our preferred destinations for Pulling O’Clock.
Split into two rooms, the private carriage booths offer a little privacy once you’ve pulled in the clubbier stage room. The venue has a sexy vibe and the chances of pulling are pretty high, especially as its a favourite haunt for backpackers.
One major downside is that it gets busy-as-fuck. Even if you manage to pull a girl for some private booth time, don’t be surprised if you end up sharing it with another couple.
Glamorama
393 Brunswick St, Fitzroy VIC 3065
Situated in the heart of the urban hipster area of Fitzroy, Glamorama is a new bar that keeps the party going until 5am on a weekend night.
They feature some of the best live bands in town as well as hosting movie nights and international DJs. The cocktails are imaginative and they also serve food. It’s a bar that attracts the under 30’s and maybe more vegans than the average Aussie male is ready for… but quality is high.
Republica
10/18 Jacka Blvd, St Kilda VIC 318
The Republica is a restaurant and cocktail lounge in a cracking location, embracing the sophisticated culture of the St Kilda beach scene.
Offering stunning views across the iconic beach, happy hour is from 5-6pm with live music from 6pm during the week and the entertainment kicking off at 1pm on a weekend. The atmosphere is relaxed but lively, and the holiday mood opens up many possibilities for a one night stand. Be warned though, it can feel pretty cliquey with those large groups.
Prudence
368 Victoria St, North Melbourne VIC 3051
This quirky bar on Victoria Street has a growing reputation as a cosy neighbourhood bar. To the naked eye, it has the cluttered appeal of a junk shop.
With tons of personality, the place feels like a house party rather than a bar and lends itself to getting intimate with strangers and meeting new women. The bar is well-stocked with draught beers and serves some interesting cocktails. Prices are decent, if you strike out, you will be guaranteed a good night even if you do end up going home alone.
Howler
7-11 Dawson St, Brunswick VIC 305
https://www.howlerbrunswick.com
The scene at Howler is very arty and other guests are likely to be related to the music scene one way or another. Think the creative types.
Frequented by some of Melbourne’s trendiest singles, the atmosphere is not as pretentious as you’d think. Just relax and take it in your stride, and you could soon be deep in conversation at the bar with some hipster chick.
Ms Collins
425 Collins St, Melbourne VIC 3000
With its clubby vibe, Ms Collins is a great party night venue with a range of ages and types of girl. They play a variety of music but tend to air on the R&B side which can keep the dancefloor pretty dirty.
With DJ and hip-hop nights as well, the club is a hotbed of potential pickups. And, if you happen to hit it up on a quiet night then you can console yourself with a haircut at the attached barbershop… quirky but fun, Ms Collins is a good night out.
The Village Belle
202 Barkly St, St Kilda VIC 3182
Located in the heart of St Kilda, this venue has been around since 1891… although we can’t imagine it was used for pulling back then. The Belle draws a varied crowd, from young professionals to beachgoers and tourists. It has undergone some major renovations to offer a more open, inviting space.
There’s definitely a chance of meeting someone new, whether you’re looking for a casual chat or a potential hookup. Expect live music, DJs and part-like atmosphere as the night ticks on.
Carlton Club
193 Bourke Street, Melbourne, VIC 3000
This flashy cocktail bar in the heart of Melbourne’s CBD is a popular weekend hot spot for all hedonists and has a reputation for its debauched party atmosphere.
There is no peak season at the Carlton Club and the multi-roomed, psychedelic styled bar has plenty of events running year round. Even if there is nothing planned, the 24 hour liquor license (as well as a huge giraffe?) help keep the atmosphere decidedly upbeat. There is a tropical, jungle themed dance area on the third floor which features a DJ booth framed by a massive elephant’s head.
Carlton Club can get wild on Friday and Saturday nights, and you can be well rewarded for your efforts.
Wows
97B Smith St, Melbourne VIC 3065
https://www.instagram.com/wowsfitzroy/
A playground for grown ups, Wows has karaoke, ping-pong, pool and indoor bocce — all designed to help break the ice. It’s a smart way of piercing the close inner-circle friendships, in a bar where the girls are always up for a laugh.
Expect revellers to pitch up alongside you if you are playing any of these side-games. Admittedly, many of them will be uber-competitive blokes. Still, the place is laid-back, friendly and encourages interaction between strangers. The onus is on having fun whilst tapping up the range of drinks on offer; fine spirits, innovative cocktails and premium beers.
Polly Bar
401 Brunswick St, Fitzroy VIC 3065
Polly Bar is an eclectic and glamourous cocktail bar serving 110 different varieties of spirits as well as over 30 different cocktails. The décor is smart and comfortable, the clientele are on the cheeky side of naughty, giving the impression that anything goes.
It’s a nice intimate bar for trying your luck, and well-situated on Brunswick Street, so you have plenty of options nearby if the vibe isn’t quite right.
For The Brave: Fly Solo At A Swinger Club
From pickup bars to swinger clubs(?!), this is like going from 0 to 80 in the time it takes to unzip your pants.
You might be wondering why a single guy would be interested in partying with couples and wife-swappers around Victoria. Well, the obviously answer is that you’re pretty much guaranteed a “good time” at these venues.
And believe it or not, some sex parties do offer a small number of entries to single guys.
Some examples include:
- Virtue & Vice — holds regular meet-ups at the Melbourne Pavilion with a small number of single guys accepted. (virtueandvice.com.au)
- The Play Pen — women looking for gangbangs (no joke!), guys invited to apply. (theplaypen.com.au)
- Wet on Wellington — yes, it’s a known as a gay sauna, but it also hosts a couple’s pool party every 3rd Monday of the month at its Collingwood venue. Single guys can get in on the action at the eyewatering price of $350. (wetonwellington.com.au)
- Shed 16 — a fully licensed bar, and a warehouse of casual encounters, this is a swinger’s paradise, but singles can get in for a premium rate of $150+ (shed16.com.au)
We’ve covered each of these venues in our Melbourne Swingers Guide, so start there if you’re feeling brave enough to ride solo at a giant orgy.
Dating Sites For Casual Encounters in Melbourne
Adult MatchMaker
https://www.adultmatchmaker.com.au
Adult MatchMaker is Australia’s largest community for casual dating. It has an international membership, but the big sell for Aussies is the 2.5 million registered domestic users. You have to buy a premium membership to unlock the basic messaging features, from which you can access a wide range of no strings fun: from kinky hook-ups to erotic chat.
Members are verified which makes it a safer way to meet people than the free classifieds; this may not seem too important to us blokes, but it does mean that the ladies are more attracted to the site.
Red Hot Pie
Red Hot Pie is another hugely-popular casual dating app, with a large member base in the Victoria area (second only to NSW). One thing you’ll notice straight away: its members aren’t shy about posing naked… even in a default profile photo!
The app is a big hit in swinging circles. Many local meet-ups, parties and club nights are sponsored by RHP. In some cases, you can only get an invitation if you are an existing member.
Adult FriendFinder
One of the best online options for casual encounters in Melbourne is Adult FriendFinder. It’s a free-to-register service that offers paid members a way to connect with other like-minded singles.
If you are a serial one-night dater then the monthly fees will be money well spent, offering a range of opportunities for hook-ups. Adult Friend Finder has a reputation for servicing pretty much anybody seeking a friends-with-benefits arrangement (FWB).
AFF isn’t exclusive to Australia. It’s the largest casual dating site in the world.
SDC
Like Adult FriendFinder, SDC is a global community where only a small percentage of the users are based in Australia. That’s not such an issue because the site is huge.
It’s targeted at swingers and open-minded couples. If you are in a relationship and looking to explore ‘The Lifestyle’, SDC is a great place to start, especially if you travel often.
Or Go Fishing On Mainstream Dating Apps
Most Aussies have only ever used ‘mainstream’ dating apps, so we probably don’t need to remind you of these. Your chances of hooking up through popular apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge will depend largely on how good looking you are.
Tinder is obviously the most well-known of the apps, but have you noticed… those Tinder Melbourne girls are incredibly picky? They can afford to wait for attractive hunks to swipe, so they do.
Bumble is a pick-up artist’s worst nightmare, since it’s the women who initiate conversations after a match is made. Not much good for our objective of fucking around.
Hinge calls itself the ‘app that’s designed to be deleted‘. Presumably because it’s so successful at matching couples, not because there’s nowhere else to go once you’ve offended half of Melbourne?
Melbourne also has its own dating app called Boop (https://www.boop.date), which is all about “actually going on dates” rather than spunking hours up the wall trying to find one. A novel concept; it’s been getting some decent reviews in the Victoria press.
Try Your Luck On The Classifieds
Alright, Billy Big Bollocks… so you give zero fucks about the horror stories?
Zero fucks for the incredibly-high chances of getting bait and switched?
If you’re determined to root random Sheilas on the classifieds, we’re not gonna try and stop you. But this is a brave decision, and one that you may well regret.
Melbourne has many classified directories, most of which are stacked to the rafters with ads for sex. Look through these ads and you’ll see most of them are submitted by sex workers looking to pick up their next Johns. Some are fairly obtuse, talking of friendships and romance, or simply fancying a shag.
But remember:
Just because it appears in the W4M section, doesn’t mean it’s not transactional.
Most of these women are expecting payment.
Through gritted teeth, we’ll give the devil his due. It is possible to hookup with random girls through the classifieds. There are too many reports of it happening for them all to be BS. It’s not something we recommend though. Use the sites below with extreme caution. Unless you’re actually prepared to spend money — in which case, these are probably the cheapest roots you’ll find around Melbs!
Locanto
https://www.locanto.com.au/melbourne/Women-Looking-for-Men/20702/
Locanto is the most popular directory for classified sex ads in Melbourne. As you can see above, there were 475 “women looking for men” when we last visited.
The ads you can see are a decent reflection of what to expect. A mix of thinly-veiled Melb escorts pleading for clients, suspiciously direct women seeking affairs, and the occasional nympho-couple looking to add some meat to the bedroom.
DoubleList
https://doublelist.com/city/melbourne/
DoubleList rose up from the ashes of Craigslist Casual Encounters getting banhammered (RIP) and Backpage being seized by the FBI. It’s a pretty poor substitute, but the usual categories are still here:
- Guys For Guys
- Women For Guys
- Guys For Women
- Women For Women
- Couples For Couples
- Couples For Her
- Couples For Him
- FWB
- And so on…
From the ads we saw in Melbourne, it’s probably a decent bet for arranging a hookup… if you’re gay.
There’s a ton of ads posted by guys. Beyond the usual escort ads, not many women are posting here. And let’s face it, why the hell would they?
Reddit Never Fails
Reddit might not be the most obvious wingman for getting laid in Melbourne, but you’d be pleasantly surprised.
Check out these Melb-focused subreddits:
- /r/r4rMelbourne/ – Melbourne, VIC’s foremost R4R (redditor for redditor) platform.
- /r/r4rMelbourneXXX/ – As above, but for horny bastards.
- /r/MelbourneAfterDark/ – Open and safe space to discuss any questions and topics of an adult or mature nature to fellow Melbournians.
- r/GWMelbourne/ – Melbourne randos sharing nude pics. What’s not to love?
- r/MelbourneSwingers/ – All the latest swinging events, meet-ups and private parties.
- r/GayHookupMelbourne/ – A welcoming space where individuals of various sexual orientations, including gay, bi, queer, trans, and straight, can connect for casual encounters.
- r/MelbourneSexSesh/ – Like a Reddit version of the classifieds, find sex partners near you.
- r/Melbourne_gloryholes/ – If you really can’t get laid, why not stick your junk through a hole in the wall?
- r/MelbourneDogging/ – For Melbournites who like dogging around the city.
Punting: Melb’s “Hookers & Whores”
Sex work is legal in Victoria, so the Melbourne punters are spoiled for choice if they are willing to pay.
We’ve already covered the extensive number of brothels around town, as well as massage shops and escort service providers. The more money you have, the better your lay.
One thing that isn’t allowed is street prostitution.
Melbourne police take a very dim view of street soliciting and will aggressively target both sex workers and clients, both from marked cars and via undercover stings.
The area around St Kilda is probably the most notorious for sex workers, along with Dalgety Street (not-so-affectionately known by the locals as “hooker’s corner“).
The women selling sex around here are referred to as “gutter crawlers” and given short shrift by the authorities. While the rates are as low as you’ll find in the city… we can’t fathom why anybody would choose to seek out full-service in this — the most dangerous way possible.
Melbourne has a bajillion legal adult venues, from cheapo AMPs to high-end luxury bordellos. Keep your doodle off the streets, boys.
